Day One, Part Two: Gold Diggers
| By Conventioneer - Feb 9th, 2006 at 4:17 pm EST |
| Also listed in: Campus Progress Blog | Undercover at CPAC 2006 |
First and foremost: free stuff rules.
Now, call me a conspiracy theorist, but I swear that every speaker we've seen so far has the knot of his tie tilted slightly to the right. Subliminal message, anyone? So far things are going pretty good, but still a little sparse on the crazy that I was hoping to see. So far, the best run in Conventionette and I have had was with the ACLU devil, proclaiming that he was "happy that the ACLU wanted to remove God from the government" *cough* separation of church and state *cough* and told us to remember, "God is the enemy." Naturally, I had Conventionette take my picture with him.
Afterward, Conventionette and I wandered around the exhibit hall, doing our best to feign interest while listening to representatives from organizations such as the NRA and Lockheed Martin. Why did we feign interest, you ask? For the swag, dude! And let me tell you, these supporters of private interest and free market did not disappoint--they hooked us up in the hopes that we sign up for their e-mail list. From "Liberals are stuck on stupid" to "Capitalist Pig," these folks knew how to really represent. But of course, I was just interested in the Frisbees and buttons, so I thanked them and was on my way.
We headed back to the main speakers room and struggled for seats--which was confusing because earlier they were all over the place. I checked my schedule and realized why--The Right Honorable Rick Santorum was set to speak. Not one to miss a bona fide sales pitch of crazy, I found a cozy spot on the floor and hunkered down. What followed was his heartwarming speech on the importance of family values and a story about the cold-heartedness of Sen. Hilary Clinton (who, coincidentally, was quite the high-profile target today), which the crowd loved. Finally, he made what was perhaps my favorite part of his speech. Sen. Santorum began talking about the importance of children being raised by "stable" families. A "stable" family, he argued, is one that included, among other things, the sanctity of marriage in the form of a union between a man and a woman. I was a little perplexed at this point because I didn't know that gay marriage had anything to do with the 50% divorce rate in this country.
Reagan Quotometer: 9
More to come…
-Conventioneer
Now, call me a conspiracy theorist, but I swear that every speaker we've seen so far has the knot of his tie tilted slightly to the right. Subliminal message, anyone? So far things are going pretty good, but still a little sparse on the crazy that I was hoping to see. So far, the best run in Conventionette and I have had was with the ACLU devil, proclaiming that he was "happy that the ACLU wanted to remove God from the government" *cough* separation of church and state *cough* and told us to remember, "God is the enemy." Naturally, I had Conventionette take my picture with him.
Afterward, Conventionette and I wandered around the exhibit hall, doing our best to feign interest while listening to representatives from organizations such as the NRA and Lockheed Martin. Why did we feign interest, you ask? For the swag, dude! And let me tell you, these supporters of private interest and free market did not disappoint--they hooked us up in the hopes that we sign up for their e-mail list. From "Liberals are stuck on stupid" to "Capitalist Pig," these folks knew how to really represent. But of course, I was just interested in the Frisbees and buttons, so I thanked them and was on my way.
We headed back to the main speakers room and struggled for seats--which was confusing because earlier they were all over the place. I checked my schedule and realized why--The Right Honorable Rick Santorum was set to speak. Not one to miss a bona fide sales pitch of crazy, I found a cozy spot on the floor and hunkered down. What followed was his heartwarming speech on the importance of family values and a story about the cold-heartedness of Sen. Hilary Clinton (who, coincidentally, was quite the high-profile target today), which the crowd loved. Finally, he made what was perhaps my favorite part of his speech. Sen. Santorum began talking about the importance of children being raised by "stable" families. A "stable" family, he argued, is one that included, among other things, the sanctity of marriage in the form of a union between a man and a woman. I was a little perplexed at this point because I didn't know that gay marriage had anything to do with the 50% divorce rate in this country.
Reagan Quotometer: 9
More to come…
-Conventioneer
!
Comments are closed for this post.
Neither did I... Interesting to know that Santorum is also a sociologist and philosopher among his many other talents, which will soon include the talent of Magically disappearing from the Senate after the 2006 elections.. I guess he just knows everything about everything which is moral and right.. I'm sure he does a lot of sexuality research in the halls of Congress.. What a piece of work..
Great articles by both you and Conventionette!! I love it!
Too bad that '50% of all marriages end in divorce' MYTH has been debunked about 1,498,404 time already.
I guess news gets to you liberals last.
LOL!
Ps And we all know how so very stable gay marriages are. If you don't believe me...well ask Ann Heche!
LOL!
ok but seriously, that marriage thing is actually true-- check out the book "What God has Joined Together?" by Dr. David Myers (a CONVERVATIVE psychologist) for facts, etc.
and how would Anne Heche know anything about stable gay marriages? as far as I know, she never married a woman...
oh wait, was that a lame gay-bashing joke? oh, i get it. ha. good one-- making fun of people for biological differences is awesome.