Okay, first of all, I never said that men aren't judged superficially or that to some extent being judged superficially can't be avoided.
All I am saying is that historically it has been worse for women and still is to this day in spite of everything else. If anything, I think men are experiencing more now what women have for years as I see more men my age put way more into their appearance than men in any other generation but it's still hasn't become as important as it has been for women (and either way it doesn't help either sex).
"When it comes to dating, women may be judged on one superficial level -- beauty -- but men are often judged on two: Their attractiveness and their income level."
Actually, no. When it comes to dating women are judged primarily on their looks while men are judged primarily on their income or occupation. I'm not saying physical appearance won't play any role in the women's choice but if you're referring to people looking for a life long relationship, women will often take a man's financial standing more seriously.
A man's income might be superficial as well but it's not AS superficial if it's related to what he's chosen to do with his life.
Also, right next to income, the next main thing women tend to look for in a husband in stability. So even if the man in question isn't earning a ton of money, but presents himself as a dependable guy which is a part of his character (which isn't superficial), it will greatly increase his chance of finding a wife.
So, basically a woman's looks are traded in for a man's wealth/status. I don't agree that that is the way it should be but it's the way it is for the majority of people and for that reason it is actually beneficial for most women to often appear superficial or docile in some way if they want to get married. Women judging men based on income and men judging women on looks are two sides of the same coin.
"If anything, it makes more sense to judge someone by their looks than to do so by their income level."
I don't think so. Looks are easiest and most likely to change. The income of your partner, if you're considering marrying them or cohabitating, can have serious implications for your future (and the future of your children if you choose to have any).
Women still make less than men, but even if you're talking about a woman earning a high salary, most men are still reluctant to leave their jobs and become house husbands and whether or not either partner stays home, most studies show that women still take care of the vast majority of hte housework and childrearing; it becomes a full time job in itself.
"Attractive people make us happy -- a simple scan of our brains proves that. By contrast, there's a wealth of evidence that money doesn't buy happiness."
Money can't buy happiness but it can limit the amount of stress in your life drastically. If people are rich and miserable, it has nothing to do with their income, whereas when poor people are suffering physically or mentally, it often is a result of their lack of income.
"That said, considering social interactions tend to center around men in competition for *female* approval, with men being expected (traditionally) to take the initiative, the idea that women are just delicate little flowers undermined by the hint of a man's approval is rather silly."
Men may compete for women, but women also compete for men and on average it's easier for a man to find a woman the older, wealthier and/or more successful/smarter he becomes. For women, it's pretty much the exact opposite. The first reason is biological; men want younger and healthier mates to reproduce.
But the other reasons reflect a desire in most men to also have women who are beneath them in some way. Women may not be delicate little flowers but many men often want them to be even if they don't admit it. Studies show men are less likely to marry women with high powered careers and women with higher I.Q.'s have a harder time finding a husband. Even many liberal men who support feminism don't always practice what they preach once they marry.
Part of that comes from the fact that many men still feel emasculated if they can't provide financially well for their wife and children, but that idea comes from the system that we have that was created by men and for the most part benefits men.
Also, men benefit both in their careers and their general well being when they have a woman at home taking care of most of their needs and most men still expect a woman to do that. Conversely, a women's personal life, well being and vocation almost always suffer after marriage. You can give some exceptions but they're still just exceptions.
But this went really far off topic. Just for the record, I just added the link because I found it bothersome; I don't think the trends in fashion indicate men wanting weak women but other things in our daily interactions most definitely do.
And, just because girls are in an all girls' school doesn't mean they haven't been socialized in a male dominated culture.
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Don't be slutty, starve yourself like a classy lady would.
Link />I for one would rather see women walking around in nothing than thongs and heels than becoming emaciated, pretending it means they're above it all.
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All I am saying is that historically it has been worse for women and still is to this day in spite of everything else. If anything, I think men are experiencing more now what women have for years as I see more men my age put way more into their appearance than men in any other generation but it's still hasn't become as important as it has been for women (and either way it doesn't help either sex).
"When it comes to dating, women may be judged on one superficial level -- beauty -- but men are often judged on two: Their attractiveness and their income level."
Actually, no. When it comes to dating women are judged primarily on their looks while men are judged primarily on their income or occupation. I'm not saying physical appearance won't play any role in the women's choice but if you're referring to people looking for a life long relationship, women will often take a man's financial standing more seriously.
A man's income might be superficial as well but it's not AS superficial if it's related to what he's chosen to do with his life.
Also, right next to income, the next main thing women tend to look for in a husband in stability. So even if the man in question isn't earning a ton of money, but presents himself as a dependable guy which is a part of his character (which isn't superficial), it will greatly increase his chance of finding a wife.
So, basically a woman's looks are traded in for a man's wealth/status. I don't agree that that is the way it should be but it's the way it is for the majority of people and for that reason it is actually beneficial for most women to often appear superficial or docile in some way if they want to get married. Women judging men based on income and men judging women on looks are two sides of the same coin.
"If anything, it makes more sense to judge someone by their looks than to do so by their income level."
I don't think so. Looks are easiest and most likely to change. The income of your partner, if you're considering marrying them or cohabitating, can have serious implications for your future (and the future of your children if you choose to have any).
Women still make less than men, but even if you're talking about a woman earning a high salary, most men are still reluctant to leave their jobs and become house husbands and whether or not either partner stays home, most studies show that women still take care of the vast majority of hte housework and childrearing; it becomes a full time job in itself.
"Attractive people make us happy -- a simple scan of our brains proves that. By contrast, there's a wealth of evidence that money doesn't buy happiness."
Money can't buy happiness but it can limit the amount of stress in your life drastically. If people are rich and miserable, it has nothing to do with their income, whereas when poor people are suffering physically or mentally, it often is a result of their lack of income.
"That said, considering social interactions tend to center around men in competition for *female* approval, with men being expected (traditionally) to take the initiative, the idea that women are just delicate little flowers undermined by the hint of a man's approval is rather silly."
Men may compete for women, but women also compete for men and on average it's easier for a man to find a woman the older, wealthier and/or more successful/smarter he becomes. For women, it's pretty much the exact opposite. The first reason is biological; men want younger and healthier mates to reproduce.
But the other reasons reflect a desire in most men to also have women who are beneath them in some way. Women may not be delicate little flowers but many men often want them to be even if they don't admit it. Studies show men are less likely to marry women with high powered careers and women with higher I.Q.'s have a harder time finding a husband. Even many liberal men who support feminism don't always practice what they preach once they marry.
Part of that comes from the fact that many men still feel emasculated if they can't provide financially well for their wife and children, but that idea comes from the system that we have that was created by men and for the most part benefits men.
Also, men benefit both in their careers and their general well being when they have a woman at home taking care of most of their needs and most men still expect a woman to do that. Conversely, a women's personal life, well being and vocation almost always suffer after marriage. You can give some exceptions but they're still just exceptions.
But this went really far off topic. Just for the record, I just added the link because I found it bothersome; I don't think the trends in fashion indicate men wanting weak women but other things in our daily interactions most definitely do.
And, just because girls are in an all girls' school doesn't mean they haven't been socialized in a male dominated culture.