Why sit shamefully in a long boring morning lecture for free food, while posing as an Aussie, when you can test drive a brand new car while eating delicious hot bagels and savoring the glorious taste of dark rich coffee!  Ha!  I love Free Food-a-Thon.   

“Feed Me Seymour” <-------- The exact roar my stomach made this morning—no lie—as I contemplated how a struggling vegan was going to get thru the day on nothing but free food. (Rick Moranis is my hero!)   

Then it hit me, I’ll “buy” a car!  The Tischer Nissan family of Laurel, Maryland definitely provides for their “potential” customers, I must admit.  While dressing the part, (I’m extra spiffy today) I passed as a young urban professional who had a few minutes to spare before tackling the world of torts and insurance policies. 

“How can I help you sir?”  Jim, the over-the-hill, balding white guy inquires.   “I’m looking for a vehicle that screams ‘informed bad ass’” I replied.  Then it happened! What I was anticipating all morning. “Sir would you care for some coffee or a bagel?” a young assistant interrupts as Jim goes on how the Altima is fully redesigned for 2007.  “Sure” I unenthusiastically admitted.  (Victory! Eat that Kate Monster!)

Jim: “You have time to go for a spin…”

I’m converted, the 270-horsepower 3.5-liter V6 Altima is impressive.  Starting with the least expensive model, the four-cylinder model 2.5 (then it’s the 2.5S and 2.5SL) the pricier V6 zooms from zero to 60 mph in only 6.6 seconds (of which I’ve discovered first hand), a fine performance for a family sedan.  Well, that’s how I spent the first hour of my morning. 

Now onto my long boring afternoon lecture for free food. My lunch plans: the Myth of the Rational Voter book forum at the Cato Institute!  Happy hunting fellow free-fooders!